PJ Sea of Monsters poster
Sigh.
Guys, I was really excited for this new installment of the Percy Jackson franchise, because I read like the entire first series within 3 months. Mind you it’s a young adult series and I was in my first year of college when I got wind of the books. But I just couldn’t but any of the 5 down! Percy Jackson and the Olympians was exactly what I wanted in a book series and had been needing ever since that bitch Rowling decided to end my favorite franchise. Excuse me, J.K. is not a bitch, I’m just upset that I’ll never have more Harry Potter in my life. Which, by extension, is undoubtedly her fault.
Anyways, it’s been about three years since the first PJ&O came out and honestly, I was under the impression they wouldn’t continue with his story line, which would just be plain shit. There is a ton of Half-bloods out there who want to see more PJ! Oh, wait, do you not know about Half-bloods? You haven’t read the amazing novels yet have you? Naughty you are! Wait, you haven’t seen the first movie yet either? What are you doing with your life?! Trying to see a sequel without watching the first movie, this isn’t a horror movie franchise you know!
Alright, well before I go any further, here are the deets you need to know. Percy and his
Hey guys, check it the daughter of Triton (Poseidon) and the son of Zeus! Awkward red-headed cousins for life man.
friends are not normal mortals. Quite the contrary, a majority of them are Half-bloods, or possibly better known originally as demi-gods. Do you ever remember learning about Greek Mythology in High School? You were probably forced to choke down the biggest book of your young life, The Odyssey. Which for me, is actually my favorite story. It’s what got me obsessed with Greek Mythology. Well, even if you don’t know anything about the Odyssey, I’m sure you’ve heard of Hercules. A great big muscular red head, who wasn’t very articulate, but still made all the ancient panties drop? I actually have no idea if he was a real red head, but that’s how Disney portrayed him, and don’t get all pissy at me for the sexual joke made right before the Disney comment. I’ve got no time to get into a conversation about the over-sexualization of cartoon characters.
Anyways. Herc was a demi-god. Half mortal and half god. (Hera wasn’t Herc’s real mother, that’s just Disney creating [for once] a perfect marriage out of the exact opposite) Hercules is the son of Zeus, the god of lightning and thunder, or the sky in general you know. So therefor his blood is half god, half mortal, you see where this entirely too long set up is going?
Artwork from the first book of Mt Olympus, floor 600
In today’s very real world, the Greek gods still exist, and so do their half-blooded offspring. This means other Greek creatures and monsters are real as well. Pretty cool concept right? Well it gets better. The Greek gods home is Mt. Olympus, correct? Well, Mt. Olympus moves across the globe to whatever country it the most powerful. It has been moving West ever since Rome kicked Greece’s ass and became the the next powerful player. Currently, who would you say is the most powerful country? The US, so Mt Olympus is actually the Empire State Building in New York. Hades is underneath Las Vegas, and Tartarus is possibly under Cleveland. But I’m not all that sure on the last part, that was just said in this shitty movie that left me unsatisfied. But those first two parts make sense, right?
Well the second book/movie takes our three returning heroes, Percy (Son of Poseidon), Annabeth (daughter of Athena), and the Satyr Grover to the Sea of Monsters. Guess what, that moved too, it is now…… The Bermuda Triangle.
So Camp Half-Blood (where all the half-bloods live and train) is in trouble, the tree that has been protecting the only safe place for half-bloods has been poisoned. This leaves the camp and all of it’s residents in huge danger, because monsters can smell demi-gods faster than a PMSing girl can smell freshly cooked brownies. Anyways, Annabeth, being one of the smartest campers, realizes that the Golden Fleece can restore the tree’s healthiness thus saving the camp. Eventually that’s what the story comes down too. Annabeth, Percy, Grover, and Tyson (Percy’s new-found half brother who also happens to be a cyclops) disobey their Camp Leader, Diynosious, and bogart on the camp’s champion (the incredibly bitchy daughter of the war god Ares) Clarisse’s quest. The quest is to find the Golden Fleece, which is known to be on Circe’s Island which is inhabited by Polympheus the Cyclops. (Yeah, if you did your homework, you’d know that this is the same cyclops that gave our hero Odysseus problems after the Trojan War.)
Yeah so that’s about it when it comes to the synopsis.
Tyson, Percy, Annabeth, and Clarisse in the Sea of Monsters
Now how is the actual movie? Really boring. I know I shouldn’t have reread the book right before viewing the film, but I’m usually pretty good about separating the two forms of entertainment. But this movie was just lack-luster. I mean, the book is by far not the best in the series. Probably my least favorite. But that doesn’t mean the movie had to be this awful. I mean, yeah, bits of it were entertaining, and the acting was decent, but over all, the movie did not recreate the same magic and wonder that was delivered in The Lightening Thief.
There were plenty of beautiful moments that were created thanks to CGI, the hippocampus, just took my breath away. The movie had plenty of funny, interesting jokes that made you chuckle, but it just didn’t deliver in the action an adventure that it could have. And the climax was just all wrong. It honestly makes me worried about the future movies, if they make any more after this dud. I don’t want to spoil anything too much, but those screen adapters, totally botched that climax up for future films. It’s like they didn’t even bother to read the entire series to make sure they wouldn’t fuck things up.
The beautiful hippocampus Rainbow.
One of my biggest problems with this story line (in both the book and the movie) is the fact that it’s called the Sea of Monsters, and yet they only really battle one monster inside that part of the sea. Which is the cyclopes, which happens to be a land monster. Like you could totally battle a cyclopes on the streets of Manhattan, so he’s not very sea-like.
But I will say by the end of the film I had a major crush for Tyson. Is it weird that I have the hots for a cyclopes? I mean, beauty is only skin deep right? I am happy that they went and fixed their most fatal mistake in the first movie. Annabeth’s hair. It was pretty important for her hair to be blonde and they hired an actress with brown straight hair. They dyed her hair for this movie, which made me laugh and happy. But then they blew their continuity when it came to the mist. On a side note, Leerman needs to grow his hair back out.
Annabeth, Tyson, Hermes, Percy
All of the side characters delivered exceptionally well. I adored Diynosious, Hermes, and Clarisse much more than I ever thought I would. So there’s a plus. They were much more likable in the film then in the book. Even the Fate Sisters, oh they were a blast to have in the beginning.
In the end, The Sea of Monsters is a lack-luster sequel that may have ruined the chance for the series to be fully produced into films. It might keep a child’s attention, but as an adult who loved Greek Mythos and the original books, it is quite dissatisfying.
